Stay or go

[Lori]

Im soo confused rite now. My life is going good but I miss being in love. Now my daughter's father want us to move outta town with him. We have had our ups and downs, but to leave my fam thats hard. Now yes I want to go with him, but our relationship has been ruff lately and it just got back right. I don't know if I shud take that big leap of faith and follow him. Help all advise is welcome ( just not from ebony) lol!!!

[Andi Leia]

At least you have your sense of humor Lori!!!LOL! Here's the thing. In life we are always approached with what I sometimes call the hidden opporotunities of life. I started on my own when I was seventeen, working a full time job and maintaining a very adult life early on due to the fact that my father died when I just turned seventeen. It was very scary then not knowing where I'd live or even if I could maintain the responsiblity of taking care of myself. But I took that leap of faith and did it. That was 24 years ago. And even back then My Sister( in sprit) Tracey did the unthinkable- She joined the army!!! She didn't know how that was going to work for her, but she did the one thing most people are afraid to do. Take that leap of faith. The thing that you have going for you is that if you make this move, you won't be doing it alone. Yes you will be in a new place, living in a perhaps more diverese or different enviroment. But this is a chance for your husband to provide you with a different and perhaps a better way of life. Sometimes men can thrive better in a new enviroment, with less distractions. This allows them to focus better and may even be an improvement on your relationship. It sound like you have the number one factor in your decision...Faith. To me, I get the impression that you truly love your mate, regardless of the "ruff times" you may have had. See this as a renewal to your love and a fresh start for you. I envy you for the amount of faith you've displayed. You and your mate obviously have what it takes for the long haul. So don't be afraid of change...it will happen no matter what, and alway before our eyes. Your family will always be here. So when you pack your bags, if you pack your bags, don't forget to take your faith with you!!!

Wishing you love, peace, happiness and joy,

Andi Leia :)

[Tracy]

I understand your anxiety about moving out of town with you betta half. Speaking from some experience, I was a military wife for the better part of 10yrs, I followed my husband from coast to coast and overseas. Living without your support system..ie...your mom, dad or friends, is overwhelming. Especially with children. My advice to you is whatever reservations that you are having, that you have a heart to heart with your mate. Also take the time to investigate whats going on in the area that your plaining to move to as far as the community is concerned and activities for your child, even daycare if you need it. Like a wise woman told me once (my grandma)"Baby have your own!" In saying that I mean you should ALWAYS! have a means of making your own money. So check out employment opportunities. Truly consider the choice and follow your 1st mind. Only you know the real deal, there are always options too. Like maybe you can allow him to go 1st and then follow after he gets things settled, make some time and take a trip down and feel things out. Or perhaps go and help setup household stay awhile, if your working see if its feasible to take a leave of absents until you feel comfortable with your decision without the feeling of giving up to much. And above all my sister pray, for wisdom (for real). Talk to your mom and dad, grandparents or someone you trust with your situation. Always make choices that make YOU happy, cause if your not happy ain't nobody gonna be happy...and thats the truth. - With you in spirit

[ewynglass]

Oh My Goodness!!!! LOL Lori you are tooo funny! I gave you wonderful advise but its cool, I'm happy you are open to others opinions as well, even though I know MY WORDS ARE BOND!!! LOL so just do what I said!! Just kidding. Thanks Andi for this site just know you will have so many discussions on here.....so ladies get ready, get ready, get ready....

[ewynglass]

Exactly...don't be afraid of change! Trust God and keep it moving...pack and make sure to Pack your Faith!

Andi Leia said:

At least you have your sense of humor Lori!!!LOL! Here's the thing. In life we are always approached with what I sometimes call the hidden opporotunities of life. I started on my own when I was seventeen, working a full time job and maintaining a very adult life early on due to the fact that my father died when I just turned seventeen. It was very scary then not knowing where I'd live or even if I could maintain the responsiblity of taking care of myself. But I took that leap of faith and did it. That was 24 years ago. And even back then My Sister( in sprit) Tracey did the unthinkable- She joined the army!!! She didn't know how that was going to work for her, but she did the one thing most people are afraid to do. Take that leap of faith. The thing that you have going for you is that if you make this move, you won't be doing it alone. Yes you will be in a new place, living in a perhaps more diverese or different enviroment. But this is a chance for your husband to provide you with a different and perhaps a better way of life. Sometimes men can thrive better in a new enviroment, with less distractions. This allows them to focus better and may even be an improvement on your relationship. It sound like you have the number one factor in your decision...Faith. To me, I get the impression that you truly love your mate, regardless of the "ruff times" you may have had. See this as a renewal to your love and a fresh start for you. I envy you for the amount of faith you've displayed. You and your mate obviously have what it takes for the long haul. So don't be afraid of change...it will happen no matter what, and alway before our eyes. Your family will always be here. So when you pack your bags, if you pack your bags, don't forget to take your faith with you!!!

Wishing you love, peace, happiness and joy,

Andi Leia :)